New genetically-engineered plants thrive on urine

Plants thrive on urineScientists at The Golden Showers Bio-tech Institute in Willyslap, North Carolina have developed a genetically-engineered line of plants that are designed to be grown in parts of the world where water is a scarce resource.

The “Wiz Power” plants receive all their nutrients from a very abundant natural resource-human urine.  Employees at The Golden Showers Bio-tech Institute are encouraged to urinate on their company’s products.  I.P. Freeley, owner of The Golden Showers Bio-tech Institute, turned his back on the audience at a recent press conference and proceeded to urinate on some genetically-engineered tomatoes to demonstrate how they are fed.

“Demand for produced fed with human urine will be strong,” predicted Freeley.  “After all, Gandhi used to drink his own pee.  We serve our own products in the company cafeteria.”  Whether Freeley’s optimism will result in strong sales remains to be seen.  The U.S.D.A. is in the process of testing the Wiz Power plants to ensure they are safe for human consumption.

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