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		<title>Tired of violence, doctor offers penile enlargements for assault rifles</title>
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		<pubDate>Tue, 01 Jan 2013 02:35:55 +0000</pubDate>
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				<category><![CDATA[Health]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[Dr. Aretha Washington, a well respected Beverly Hills cosmetic surgeon, has an offer men can&#8217;t refuse-trade in your assault rifle for a larger penis. Over the years, Dr. Washington has performed thousands of penile enlargement surgeries.  In conversing casually with her male patients, they all have one thing in common. Their small penises force these [...]]]></description>
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		<title>Cash-strapped Greek animal shelter lets online users kill animals</title>
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		<pubDate>Tue, 15 May 2012 19:41:42 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dead Serious News</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[International]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[The current financial crisis in Greece has wide-ranging consequences for everyone, including their animal population.  Greeks are unable to afford their pets or donations to animal shelters, creating a critical situation.  One shelter believes it has found a win-win solution-let online visitors euthanize unwanted pets from the comfort of their homes. Snuffalucolus, a small town [...]]]></description>
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		<title>Tebow:  Jesus gave me a donkey punch</title>
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		<pubDate>Mon, 19 Mar 2012 18:36:55 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dead Serious News</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Sports]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[Tim Tebow, the Denver Broncos&#8217; evangelical quarterback, was distraught upon hearing the news that his team signed free agent Peyton Manning to be their next starting quarterback.  In tears, Tebow openly questioned whether Jesus actually loved him. &#8220;I gave my life to Jesus and what did he do for me?&#8221;, wept Tebow.  &#8220;He betrayed me!  Jesus [...]]]></description>
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		<title>&#8220;Anatomically correct&#8221; Steve Jobs action figure to go on sale</title>
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		<pubDate>Mon, 16 Jan 2012 23:59:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dead Serious News</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Tech]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[A Taiwanese doll manufacturer announced today its plans to produce an &#8220;anatomically correct&#8221; Steve Jobs action figure that will go on sale in the next few months.  Ding Ling, a privately owned company, admitted that it had invited controversy. Ding Ling&#8217;s surprise announcement came on the heels of Hong Kong&#8217;s In Icon&#8217;s decision not to produce a Jobs action [...]]]></description>
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		<title>&#8220;Teblowing&#8221; gaining popularity among Christians</title>
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		<pubDate>Sat, 14 Jan 2012 17:55:12 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dead Serious News</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Sports]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[Tim Tebow, quarterback for the Denver Broncos, has not only energized Broncos fans, but Christians across the country.  Hero worship has inspired a new trend-Teblowing. Teblowing is described as performing oral sex while Tebowing.  Missy Tobias,  a Southern Baptist, has described the experience as &#8220;spiritual.&#8221;  Gay or straight, millions of Christians are now Teblowing their significant [...]]]></description>
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